Obama Explains to Falafel His Iran Ballistic Missile Policy

Obama Explains to Falafel His Iran Ballistic Missile Policy

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After the threat Vice President Joe Biden issued with regard to the US taking action if the ballistic missile Iran tested were confirmed, Falafel contacted the White House to arrange for an interview with the supreme leader Barack Obama in the hope Obama explains to Falafel his Iran ballistic missile policy.

To speed things up, Falafel took advantage of the Open Skies Treaty to hitch a ride on one of Russia’s top spy planes straight into Andrews Air Force Base.


Falafel: “Thank you Mr. President for this important interview. Can you explain to the world what is your policy with regard to Iranian testing of ballistic missiles that could reach Saudi Arabia and Israel?”

Obama: “If the tests actually took place, then …”

Falafel (Interrupting): “Sorry for interrupting you Mr. President, but the Mullahs themselves confirmed they tested an 800-km ballistic missile fired from an underground silo.”

Obama: “That does not prove they did it. We all know those lying and cheating bastards.”

Obama (Taking a deep breath): “As I was saying, if those tests are confirmed by our experts, then we will act.”

Falafel: “How will you confirm these tests Mr. President?”

Obama: “Only if they reach their target.”

Falafel: “Excuse me!”

Obama: “If the missiles reach their targets. Say, they land in Riyadh or Jerusalem, then we dispatch our experts to those two cities to confirm that Iran did actually test the ballistic missiles.”

Falafel: “Would it not be too late for our allies?”

Obama: “Until Iran actually attacks Israel or Saudi Arabia, our hands are tied.”

Falafel: “Have you consulted with our allies on your “destroy first, ask questions later” policy?”

Obama: “Not yet, we are waiting for the Iranian testing to be completed first. There is no use alarming our allies if the Mullahs have no intention of firing these missiles, now do we?”

Falafel: “What would your administration do if those missiles are fired?”

Obama: “First and foremost, I will speak to the United Nations about an appropriate response. We will circulate a resolution with multiple choice question.”

Falafel: “What is the question and its choices if I may ask?”

Obama: “Here is a copy of the resolution. Already ready to go.”

Falafel (Reading out loud): “Should the United Nations sanction Israel and Saudi Arabia for not moving out of the Iranian missiles way? “Yes” or “No” answer, please”

Obama: “You see Falafel, the United Nations is superbly qualified to protect America and her allies.”

Obama Explains to Falafel His Iran Ballistic Missile Policy


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